Hear is Something

Anti-self-help content.

I hear there’s people living in tree trunks. I hear there’s people riding cows into grocery stores. I hear people are growing psilocybin mushrooms and mixing them into the shiitake pile. I hear people are executing polar bears. I hear the 1 millionth Face ID triggers the C4 in your gayPhone to blow your hands and face off. 

I hear the frogs are gay. 

I hear kids are donating NFTs to ISIS. 

I hear the Fed got roofied and woke up hog tied in a homeless camp. 

I hear there’s no more bakers baking cakes, just a machine making cakes for the cake-eating cake-people.