Sitges, Spain

Apr 27, 2024

I’m in Spain. Flaneuring. Wandering around visiting friends and making new ones. Lots of tobacco and croissants here. Mascarpone croissants—those little bastards make the red-eye well worth it.

I’m on a train now, getting out of the Barcelona to a quiet beach town with a $100/night hotel where I can think and write. There are not many people on this train, then we stop and suddenly there are.

There’s a woman looking at me. She sighs and pulls out her phone, joining the ranks of the addicted. There’s an old man with a cap and a cane, he’s the last to pull out his phone. I can see his screen. He pokes around. Doesn’t really know what he’s doing. Puts it away. Later he finds his way Facebook, or some look alike.

There’s a woman with a kindle. That’s nice. A Gypsy-looking woman next to me gets up and moves, so a mother can sit with her son, who the mother calls “Bonito”.

Bonito is eating a sandwich. Grain is weird—grass seed mixed with god only knows. I’m very tired now, and the writing is getting sloppy. Low blood sugar makes for sloppy psyche. Very few chemicals reliably enhance brain performance in the short term. One is caffeine, the other is sugar. Overuse comes with a curse.

God said to his people: Spiking blood sugar makes for a sloppy psychosomatic experience.

A woman is reading a physical book, and the old man with the cane is at peace. Three women are resting their eyes.

I’m on a train in Spain. A Spain train. Sprain train brain rain.

I’m laughing at myself. Bonito looks at me.

Finish your grain, Bonito.

His mom wakes up and he smiles at her. We’re plowing throw tunnels of the coastal Catalonian hills, which run right into the Mediterranean without hesitation. We’re darting in and out of darkness and sunshine. Mostly darkness.

If I was strategic with my seat placement, I could get an ocean view. Next time.

I’m working on an essay called Deletion of Death that explores death, personal identity, and new technologies. Will the continuation of me be whoever inherits my email list?

I exit the train in Sitges, Spain.

I’m walking around the Spanish beach town, spamming the shutter button on my gayPhone 14.

There’s a kid playing soccer with a man who’s holding books. I say “Puedo jugar?”

The kid kicks me the ball and says “Where are you from?”

I receive the pass and say “Boston, United States.”

I show off an absurd amount of talent, especially for a guy wearing a Hawaiian shirt and a backpack. His dad sucks at soccer, so this kid is now having the time of his life. All of a sudden, a little girl is climbing the massive stone wall behind our impromptu training session. She runs and gets her friend, and now there are two tiny humans free-climbing the wall. Amateur photographers, such as myself, can’t resist the shutter button.

My eagle eye vision spots a cute blonde leaning off the side of the stairs, wielding a proper camera.

I say Adios to my soccer buddies and run for the steps. At the top, out of breath, I open with “Did you get a good photograph?”

She confirms she did.

“I was down there playing soccer.”

“Oh, that was you!”

Two other people are looking at me, so I assume they are a group.

“Where are you guys from?” gets the ball rolling.

Charlotte is German with French name, and Leonardo is Argentinean with an Italian name. They are photographers living here in Sitges. They invite me to do a free photography tour of their home city. We exchange instagrams. Later, she messages me:

Hi Chris, it was lovely meeting you today.

You are really welcome to join us for the photo walk anytime, we would be thrilled to have you. I hope you enjoy your time in Sitges. ☀️

Charlotte

I check my blank calendar and reply that I am down, then sit down outside at a restaurant and order a drink. I finally put down my phone and look at the menu. It’s vegan.

The waitress asks what I’d like.

“Just the check,” I say.

She’s more frazzled than I anticipated. There’s an awkward silence then she scurries off. A minute later, a hot Hawaiian-looking girl comes out with half a coconut that has the check and a rock inside.

“Why didn’t you order any food?” she says.

“I didn’t realize this was a vegan place.”

“But it’s really good!” she says.

“Start eating vegan,” I tell her, “And next thing you know you’re into climate and communism.”

I leave.

I stroll a few blocks and find a wall of spinning chickens. I get half a chicken for $6.50.

“Thank you sir,” I say.

“Thank you brotha,” he says.

I walk back to my hotel, which is situated in the gay district. I suspect the gays and the vegans have an alliance.

I eat my chicken and write.

The following morning, I stumbled out of the hotel at 6:45 to catch sunrise photos.

Spanish cops drove their smart car drive through the tunnel by the beachfront church. I took a video. The driver stopped, rolled down the window and started machine-gunning me with vowels.

“I don’t speak Spanish,” I said.

“Give me the mobi,” the driver said.

“What?”

“Delete!”

“You want to see the video?”

“Delete!”

I show them the video.

“Delete!”

I delete it.

“Otra.”

“What?”

We all know I know what they mean.

“Otra.”

I go into recently deleted and hover my finger over Recover.

“No!”

I walk through the tunnel and look out over the ocean. To my surprise, there appears to be a dead body on the beach. A police officer is toweling off, probably because she went out and dragged it in.

Whoa.

I get closer.

I listen to the pigeons. They know who done it.

“I know who did it,” I tell the hopeless investigators.

“De verdad?”

“Yeah, de verdad. It was those two cops who drove through the tunnel—they’re getting away!”

Congratulations! You made it to the end! Hit the heart button, or comment, to let me know you made it (:

I’m flying around the world staying at shitty hostels to write these stories. If you support this publication, that’s what your money is going towards: Original art. Shoutout to my paid subs: Leanne, Garry, Anonymous, and Hani, who helped bring you this post.

A few offerings:

My book All Outcomes Are Acceptable weaves personal stories, poetry, and fiction. It’s available on Amazon.
I am helping writers go from good to great to getting paid. Contact me to see if we can work together.
I post videos and podcasts on YouTube.